Today we find ourselves learning a bit of Colombian Spanish. We're going to take a look at a short clip from a movie called Dios los junta y ellos se separan.
Before we translate the title of the movie I should tell you that sometimes movie titles don't translate directly. In fact, sometimes they're just flat out different. But since I don't think there's an English version of this one, we'll just make a literal translation.
Dios los junta y ellos se separan
God joins them and they separate themselves
I've yet to see it, but it's supposed to be really good. If you're interested in taking a closer look at it click here to see it in Amazon.
FYI, you can find this clip in YouTube, but for our purposes I've embedded it right here in this post. If you can't see the video, here's the direct link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEVGreoChq8
But enough chit-chat. Let's get right to it and start having some fun and go through this video curse word by curse word. I'm not going to translate every line, just the ones that have swear words in them. Which may honestly be most of the conversation.
Esposa Colombian Emputada
Actually, lo primero primero (first things first), we'll start with a little context.
Our Colombiana is inspired to give her husband this wonderful speech because she found out he has a child outside of their marriage.
Now let's really jump into this, starting with the video title.
Esposa Colombiana emputada
A pissed off Colombian wife
Emputada is the translation for pissed off, which comes from the verb emputar, to piss off.
Ese hijueputa me emputó
That son of a bitch pissed me off
No estoy enojado, estoy emputado
I'm not angry, I'm pissed off
Ok, now we can get to the video. It doesn't take long to get into the action. At about 11 seconds in we hear our first word.
Usted sí es mucho hijueputa ¿No?
You really are a real son of a bitch, aren't yo?
Hijueputa is just another way of saying hijo de puta. You'll also hear hijueputa. Very Colombian. You may also hear it as jueputa. No matter what form it takes, it still adds up to someone being a son of a bitch.
And if you're wondering about the word sí, it's there for emphasis. Here's another example of how you can use it to emphasis something.
Tú sí eres un pendejo
You really are an asshole
Next we get to:
¿Cómo va ser tan malparido y no contarme?
How can you be such a bastard and not tell me?
Malparido is a bit tricky to translate. In fact, to my knowledge it doesn't have a direct translation.
It means something along the lines of a bastard.
It's meaning in Spanish has to do with someone being born with major problems such as serious birth defects, aborted, something along those lines. Mal, meaning bad and parido - birthed. Badly birthed. The important thing for you to know is that it's a strong insult, not to be tossed around lightly. Some other potential translations in English could be asshole, prick, motherfucker, you get the idea.
Our esposa Colombiana emputada starts another rant that ends with...
La mierda que es usted
Mierda means shit. And the whole sentence translates to something like "you're a piece of shit" or "the piece of shit that you are".
A little later she makes a reference to zorras asquerosas - filthy sluts. Nasty would work as translation as well, take your pick.
Next we hear her tell Benjamin to "váyase a dónde esta tu mamita" and a few other choice words that apparently Benjamin raises an objection to. He didn't like her bringing his mother into the conversation. We have no idea what Benjamin says, but she replies with:
Me meto con su mamá o quién me da la puta gana
I'll involve your mother or whoever the fuck I feel like
Dar la gana is a very flippant sounding expressing used to say you'll do like whatever you feel like doing. Add the word puta in there and you've just intensified the meaning. Mind you that in this context puta translates to fuck, not whore.
The next phrase doesn't involve swear words, but it's pretty strong and worth mentioning.
Que se calle Benjamin
Shut up Benjamin
She follows this up with another round of insults. She isn't actually swearing this time, but hey, it's a pretty good insult.
Va a ser libre como el perro asqueroso y chantoso que es
You're going to be free like the filthy dog you are
By the way, perro chantoso is a loose dog that's just roaming the streets.
And then our Colombiana wraps things up with:
Va a arrepentir toda de su malparida hijueputa vida
This one is a bit trickier to translate because there is no direct English equivalent. In this case we're going to try and maintain the spirit of the message.
Va a arrepentir toda de su malparida hijueputa vida
You're going to regret all of your miserable fucking life
And finally, she wraps things up with:
¿Y sabe que Benjamin? ¡Púdrase papito!
Púdrase comes from the verb podrir, meaning to rot. Only in this case it's a lot stronger, something along the lines of screw you or maybe even fuck you. So our translation is:
You know what Benjamin? Fuck you!
You can also say:
Púdrete en el infierno
You can rot in hell
Wow. She packed a lot into a 30 second rampage.
Finally, as I was looking through the video comments one of them jumped out at me.
Que puteada tan elegante
A puteada is what we call getting cursed out. Only it's not a polite word.
The translation would be something like
She cursed him out so elegantly
And that my friends, is it. You now have a nice collection of Colombian swear words to add to your toolbox. While malparida is very a much a Colombian thing, the rest of the words we looked at are not restricted to Colombian Spanish. You'll hear them used to some degree or another in several Spanish speaking countries.
Well, that's it for today.
¡Hasta la próxima!