Chupame los huevos

Chúpame los huevos
Suck my balls

This is one of many fun things you can say with the word huevos.  You can use this to tell someone off, or you can use to get want you in the bedroom.  Hey, it sounds crude, but some people like that kind of talk.  And yes ladies, you can use this too.

Chupame las tetas/panocha
Suck my tits/pussy

You can use milder words if you like (seños instead of tetas), but this blog is all about being vulgar, so I decided to go with the flow.

Anyway, the topic of today's conversation is the word huevos.  There are many, many many expressions involving the word huevos, and I'm only going to talk about the few that I'm familiar with.

If for some reason you missed it in the title, huevos can mean balls, as in testicles.  And just like in English, if you want to say someone is "ballsy" you can say something like:

Este cabrón si tiene huevos
This bastard has some balls

Or simply "¡que huevos!".

Then there's huevón.

¡Ay, qué huevón que eres!
You are such a lazy fuck.

No seas huevón
Don't be a lazy bastard

There's no direct translation of huevón that I can think of, but the options I chose are probably pretty damn close.   And if this lazy person happens to be a female, then just switch it up to huevona.  Keep in mind that I'm talking about the meaning of this word in Mexico, and could mean something completely different in other countries.

There's also the expression "A huevo".

Possible the most common use of "A huevo" is agreement.

¿Quieres ir de putas compa?
¡A huevo!

You want to go pick up some hookers dude?
Fuck yeah!

While "A huevo" is best used with your friends.  It's probably stronger than "hell yeah" but maybe not quite "Fuck yeah". Translation is a tricky business.  The point here is it's pretty rude. 

Here's another usage:

When you're told to do something "a huevo", you have two options.  Lo haces o lo haces - You do it or you do it. 

A huevo te vas a ir al escuela
You're going to go school whether you fucking like it or not

Here's a funny saying I found:

El Mexicano no te ordena -Te manda a huevo
A Mexican doesn't order you to do it, he tells you're going to fucking do it no matter what

Here's another good one:

Ni a huevos

This is a fun way to tell someone what you're not going to do.

¿Me prestas cien dolares?
¡Ni a huevos!

¿Quieres correr un maratón conmigo?
¡Ni a huevos!

You can think of this as no fucking way, you couldn't force me to do it, never ever.

Lastly, you can use "A huevo" when someone tells you something good happens.

¡Compa! Me tocó el gordo
¡A huevo!

Dude, I won the lottery.
Fucking sweet!

Well, that's it.  I know there are other uses of the word "huevo", and as I learn more I'll continue to share them with you. 

¡Hasta la próxima!