Te voy a chingar

Chingar is such a versatile verb, it seems that it can be used to say just about anything.   In this case, it translates quite nice to English...

"I'm going to fuck you up"

Hopefully the only time you'll hear  this is as a joke, which is how I heard it.  The good news is it should be fairly easy to tell if someone is joking or not with this one.  And if they aren't joking, then you've mananged to get yourself into a pickle, hopefully not with something you learned from my blog, LOL.

And like everything else in Spanish, there's more than one way to skin a cat.

Voy a partir tu mandarina en gajos
I'm going to tear your mandarin orange into slices.

Te voy a partir la madre, hijo de la chingada
I'm going to split your mother you son of a bitch.

Well, our second example doesn't translate so well, but both examples mean the same thing as "Te voy a chingar"....somebody wants to kick your ass. 

Since we're on the topic of bodily harm, there's some more vocabulary that fits right in...putazos, golpes and chingadazos.  In fact, I actually discussed putazos and golpes in my other blog,  you can read the entry here.

But basically, golpes are punches or hits of the normal sort.  When you give out putazos and chingadazos, you're really handing out an ass-whooping.  You can think of the two as synonyms, but do remember they're both a bit crude.  In fact, the picture below gives you a visual image of chingadazos, but if you click the link you'll see a very entertaining video that  brings chingadazos to life.

I hope you enjoy the video, I always get a good laugh out of it.

¡Nos vemos!