¡No soy joto!

No soy joto
I'm not a fag

Like in English, there are many ways to talk about homosexuals.  And if you want to be politically correct, this is not one of them.

Joto is a very offense way of calling someone gay.  Except that is much stronger the word gay.  It's more like the word fag.  And for those of you don't know, fag is short for faggot.

There's also the word puto, which also means fag.  So when it's time to hurl insults, you've got at least two options.  But just like in English, there's more than one way to skin a cat, so let's look at a few other words.

There's also maricón and marica, which for all practical purposes, mean the same thing.   And interestingly enough, sometimes puto and maricón can be used as a greeting among friends.  Clearly you need to be on very good terms with your friends for these kinds of greetings.

The standard non-offensive words are homosexual and gay.  Homosexual and gay have the same spelling in English and Spanish, just the pronunciation differs.

Let's look at a few simple examples:

¡Qué joto eres!
You're such a fag

Mire ese puto
Look at that fag

I don't think it will be hard for you to figure out how to use these, we don't need a ton of examples.

That's it for today, short, sweet and to the point!

¡Espero que te sirva!

¿Y a tí qué tortillera?

A picture is woth a thousand words, so let's start with that.

This is a tortillera:

A tortillera is a machine that makes tortillas.  A tortillera is also a woman who makes and/or sales tortillas.

Tortilleras is also another word for lesbians.  While I love pictures, in this case I thought that might a bit much in this case, so you'll have to find your own pictures.

There are a few other words that mean lesbian.  Let's start with the ones you can use in polite company like homosexual, gay and lesbiana.  Notice that homosexual and gay are spelled the same in Spanish, just use your Spanish accent.  While it's good to know the PC (politically correct) terms, those are no fun, and this blog is all about teaching you bad words anyway.

There's also cachapera and bollera.  You may still be wondering what tortillera, bollera and cachapera have to do with being a lesbian.  Well, I haven't yet found out where cachapera comes from, but here's an explanation I found for bollera and tortillera:

Tortillera, mujer homosexual. Viene de la palabra tortillera que en mexico es la mujer que hace las tortillas y las palmea entre sus manos como se supone que hacen dos sexos de mujeres al chocar uno contra otro, de ahí pasó al castellano. Bollera, porque es un bollo de pan, pan con pan sin chorizo en medio.

Personally, I thought the part about "pan con pan sin chorizo en medio" was pretty funny. Just in case you need a translation, it's "bread with bread without sausage in the middle". I'm guessing you can figure out what that means.

 Let's try to put a few of these words to use:

¿Eres tortillera?

Are you a lesbian?

¿Y a tí que tortillera?
What it's to you dyke

No salgas mas con esa cachapera
Don't go out any more with that dyke

No sabía que tu primer es tortillera
I didn't know your sister is a lesbian

Notice the suttle change in meaning from lesbian to dyke, depending on the context. I believe bollera, tortillera and cachapera are more accurately translated to dyke when used as an insult, and lesbian otherwise. 

Well, that's it for today.  ¡Hasta la próxima!



Estoy encabronado contigo

We all get angry, it's just that sometimes the word angry doesn't really express just how angry you are.

In English when you get really, really angry the expression is "to get pissed off".  In Spanish you would use the verb encabronarse.  

Me encabroné
I got pissed off

Me voy a encabronar
I'm going to get pissed off

Se encabrono el vato
The guy got pissed off

There's also encabronar, which means "to piss off"

Estoy encabronado contigo
I'm pissed off at you

That's it!  Pan comido.  Now you know just a little bit more Spanish (or English) and can express how you really feel.

¡Hasta la próxima!