¡Ni Madres!

Today we're going to talk about the expression "ni madres".

There are two meanings to this phrase that I know of, and that's what we're going to discuss today.

The first meaning is the most simple and straight-forward, not that either of these are complicated.

¡Ni Madres!
No fucking way

Not that ni madres actually translates to the F-word, but this is a pretty close approximation.  The big thing to recognize here is that "ni madres" is a very rude way of saying "no way!".  It's usage is the same as "no way", so we don't really need a lot of detail here.

Let's move on to our next example.

No le entiendo ni madres cuando habla

Ni madres takes on a completely different meaning in this example.  It translates to something like "shit" or "jack shit".

No le entiendo ni madres cuando habla
I don't understand jack-shit when he talks

Here are a few more examples:

 Mi telefono se chingó y ahora no veo ni madres en la pantalla
My phone is fucked up and now I can't see shit on the screen

No hice ni madres en el trabajo hoy
I didn't do jack-shit at work today

Pan comida, ¿verdad?

That's it for today, ¡hasta pronto!

¡No me digas chingaderas!

Chingaderas has several meanings, one of which is the stupid things people say, especially lies.  Sometimes we call this kind of stuff bullshit. 

In English we refer to this as bullshitting someone, or "to bullshit".  In Mexican Spanish it would be "decir chingaderas".

Here's an example:

No me digas chingaderas
Don't bullshit me OR
Don't give me that bullshit

You may have noticed these are not exact translations.  Remember, literal translations are not always possible.  It's the essence of the phrase we're trying to capture, and this comes pretty close.

Here are some examples:

¿Qué chingaderas son estas?
What kind of bullshit is this?

Estas son chigaderas
This is bullshit

¡Son chingaderas!
Bullshit!

Well, that's it for today.  I think we've all had enough chingaderas for one day.

¡Adios!

Te voy a meter hasta el fondo

I've talked a bit about cursing, so let's jump back to the topic of sex.  There are a few things I'm going to share with you that you might find both fun and useful in an intimate relationship.

The verb "meterse" has many uses, such as to put in , to get in or get involved in.  Here's an  example:

Me gusta la piscina, pero no me meto
I like the pool, but I don't get in

It also happens that meterse is also used in a sexual context.

Metemela papi
Put (stick) it in me daddy  OR
Give it to me daddy

And it should be obivious that when she says "papi", she isn't referring to her biological father.

So now that we know how meterse is being used, let's move on to "el fondo".

"El fondo" means "the back".  Like "in the back".  If you're in a restaurant and you're looking for your friends, your waiter might say...

Estan en el fondo
They're in the back

Now I think we have enough background info to decipher our phrase, but a literal translation won't really work here, so I'm going to make a translation that carries the same sentiment.

Te voy a meter hasta el fondo

Here are some possible translations:

I'm gonna stick it all the way in
I'm gonna give you everything
I'm gonna give you every inch of this

You can also say something like:

Metamela toda papi
Put (stick) it all in daddy  OR
Give it all to me daddy

You can also just use the verb meter and say: Métalo papi

Obviously those last two lines are for the ladies

Guys, you could say:

Te voy a meter toda
I'm going to give you all of it (everything)

Remember, everything in Spanish doesn't translate directly, and it's more important to get the "idea" than it is to try make a literal or exact translation, and I hope I've explained it well enough for you get the idea.

Just remember before you meter anything anywhere, be sure to practice sexo seguro. 

¡Hasta la próxima!